DateableMyth: sugar dating sites are all scams
Scammers work every dating site, but their tricks follow patterns you can recognise. Meeting before money moves shuts out most of them.
Scammers work every dating site and social platform, but their patterns are predictable, and meeting in person before any money moves stops most of them. The trick is knowing what to watch for and trusting your instincts when something feels off.
Where romance scams happen
Romance scams are not a sugar dating problem. Nearly 60% of people who lost money to a romance scam in 2025 said it started on social media, not on dating sites at all. 1 Scammers cast a wide net: they work Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, dating apps and mainstream dating sites. Dateable is no exception to the rule that scammers are everywhere, but it is also no worse than anywhere else.
The patterns scammers follow
Real scammers do not invent new tricks. They follow a handful of well-worn patterns that have worked before, and each one has a clear tell.
- Money before meeting. They ask for money, a gift card, a plane ticket or a loan before you meet. Sometimes they wait weeks to build trust, but money always comes before a face-to-face meeting.
- Excuses to avoid meeting. They have work out of the country, a sick relative, a business emergency, or a visa problem. When you suggest video chat to verify who they are, they dodge it or claim their camera is broken.
- Requests to move off the site. They push you to WhatsApp, email or another platform early, away from Dateable's reports and block tools.
- Fees and forms. They ask for fees to "release" money they claim to have, or want you to fill out forms to verify your identity or bank account.
If any of these happen, the person is not a real match. They are working through a script.
Who is actually on Dateable
Dateable's [verification] system is a live selfie compared against your profile photos by a real reviewer. It shows the person matches what they say they look like. A verified member has passed this straightforward check: they are who they claim to be. It does not check identity documents, income or age, and does not guarantee character. 2 What it does do is remove the scammer's first disguise.
Scammers rely on stolen photos or faces pulled from social media. A verification step stops that particular scam before it gets off the ground. Most romance scammers are counting on the victim to never actually see their face.
You can also [spot a scam] yourself with a reverse image search on your phone. Open Google Images, search their photo, and see whether the same face shows up elsewhere on the web. If it does, ask them about it before you meet. A real person will have an explanation. If they panic, make excuses or vanish, you have your answer.
The rule that stops most scams
One rule stops the vast majority of dating site scams: do not send money to someone you have not met in person. Not a "gift", not a "loan", not for any reason. 2
I don't send money or gifts to people I haven't met in person, no matter what story they tell me. Once we're together for coffee, I'll know if it's real.
That simple boundary removes your profile from any scammer's target list. They are after people willing to send money unseen. The moment you say no, you are not worth their time.
What to do if something feels wrong
Trust the feeling. If a profile reads like a template, if the messages are always perfect and never quite answer your questions, if they keep moving the goal posts or asking for favours: block and report.
On Dateable, report and block are one button press from any profile, message or Board listing. Your report reaches a real person, and you are done with that account. You do not owe anyone your time, your money, your photos or a reason.
If you have already sent money, contact your bank straight away. They can sometimes halt the transfer. Report the account to Dateable. Then, if you are in Australia or New Zealand, contact IDCARE (1800 595 160) for identity recovery help.
Sugar dating is not a scam, but scammers work here
The myth that sugar dating sites are scams confuses two separate things: the platform itself, and the individuals who show up to misuse it. Scammers appear on every dating site because that is where people go to look for connection. The moment you decide to look online for a match, you need to be a little bit careful. Careful is not the same as paranoid.
Being careful means meeting in a public place, telling someone you trust where you are and when you will be back, and most of all, never sending money to someone you have not met face to face. If you [report] something that feels wrong on Dateable, your report reaches a person who can act on it. You have the tools to protect yourself and to stop wasting time on fake profiles.
Sugar dating works because both people know what they are looking for and they say it from the start. That openness is a strength, not a weakness. Keep your wits about you, follow the rules that work, and enjoy the process.
Sources
- Federal Trade Commission (2026). New FTC Data Show People Have Lost Billions to Social Media Scams.
- Scamwatch (ACCC) (2026). Relationship scams.
