DateableHow to pick a meeting place for a Board date
Choose a public place with other people around. Take your own transport. If the venue changes at the last moment, cancel.
Pick a public place with other people around for your first meeting. A hotel bar, restaurant or cafe works; a private home or hotel room does not, and will be rejected at review.
Why the place matters
Your first meeting with someone from Dateable is a moment when the two of you find out whether your photos match and whether you actually want to spend time together. It is also a moment when you are meeting a stranger in person for the first time, and where your safety comes first.
A public place with other people around makes that meeting safer. There are people nearby if you need help, and the other person is less likely to behave badly when others are watching. Choose a public venue when you meet someone you met online.
What counts as public
A public place has staff and other customers. Hotels, restaurants, bars and cafes are all public. A park or street with people nearby counts too, but it is less safe than an indoor venue because there are fewer people to see what is happening, and you are more exposed to the weather.
What does not work: your home, their home, a hotel room (even if they say the bar is in the room and it is a suite), a beach house, a private boat or any place where you are alone together. Dateable's review team will reject a first meeting at any of these places 1, and you will not be able to post the arrangement.
If the place changes
You and your date agreed on a place. Then they message you an hour before, or when you arrive, and suggest a different venue. A new place you do not know. What do you do: cancel.
There is no emergency that requires a meeting to move somewhere new at the last minute. If they say they are stuck in traffic and suggest their place instead, the answer is to reschedule for another day at the original venue. If they say the restaurant closed and suggest a hotel room, the answer is to go to a different restaurant, or to reschedule. A change at the last minute is a warning sign, and cancelling costs you nothing 2.
I can't make it to that place now. Let's pick another public venue or reschedule for another day.
You do not owe an explanation. You do not owe a reschedule. Say it, then block them if they keep arguing.
Travel and safety
Take your own transport. A taxi or car you drive yourself means you leave when you want to leave. You are not waiting for them to give you a ride home or walking to their car. You choose the moment the date ends.
Tell someone you trust where you are going, what time you expect to be home, and to call or text you at a certain time. If they do not hear from you by then, they know something might be wrong. Keep your phone charged and keep it with you 3.
Money and generosity
Your date posted on the Board and you applied. They accepted your application. On Dateable, generosity flows from one side to the other, and the details are yours to arrange. Where to spend money is part of that conversation.
If your date is the generous member, they might offer to pay for the meal or drinks. That does not change the rule about where you meet. Public place, your transport, someone knows where you are. A generous meal in private is still private, and Dateable will not let it happen.
If you are the generous member, the same applies. Pick a restaurant or bar where you are comfortable spending what you planned to spend. Let them know the budget so they can decide whether to apply. A second date can be somewhere nicer, or somewhere private. A first meeting is always public.
What to plan before you meet
- The exact venue: name, address and how to get there
- The date and time, and whether you are meeting outside or inside
- A way to reach each other if you are late: exchange a phone number or Dateable message before you leave home
- What you are going to do and roughly how long it will take, so the person waiting for you knows you are not ditching them
- Who you are telling, and when you will update them that you are home safe
A place where the two of you can actually talk matters too. A very loud bar is public but you will spend the whole date shouting. Pick somewhere you can hear each other and see each other's face. Dateable's Board lets you trade messages before you meet, so you both know what to expect: what you are looking for, what they are looking for, and what a good time together looks like for each of you. Plan a date that works for both of you.
First meeting, second meeting
You met at the cafe, had coffee, and you both want to see each other again. Excellent. A second date can be at a restaurant, or it can be at their place, or yours. The safety rules change when you are meeting someone a second time and you have chosen to continue. That is yours to decide.
But the first time: public, your transport, someone knows where you are. The Board is built on those three things, and they apply whether you are generous or attractive.
Sources
- Sexual Assault Resource Centre, North Metropolitan Health Service (Government of Western Australia) (2021). Safe online dating.
- New Zealand Police (2026). Safety advice.
- Victoria Police (2025). Safety tips when meeting someone from online.
