DateableWhat to change for your privacy after an arrangement ends
Change passwords and turn on two-step login the day it ends. Revoke photo access, switch off location sharing, and review who sees your social media.
The moment an arrangement ends, work through this list. Change any password they might know and turn on two-step login on everything. Then block or limit what they can see on your accounts. Do it the same day it ends, before you sleep. An ex-partner who had access to your accounts, your location, or your photos can cause real harm. The steps below take an hour and protect you.
Change your passwords and lock them out
Change the password on any account they knew. This means dating sites, email, banking, social media, or anything that holds your data. Scammers who get into your accounts can change your passwords and lock you out, and by porting your mobile number to their own device they can intercept bank SMS codes and one-time PINs 1. An ex-partner has the same ability. They can lock you out of your own accounts, drain a bank account, or use your email to reset passwords elsewhere.
Make each password strong and different. A weak password or one you use on multiple sites lets someone back in through a different door. If you reuse passwords, change those too. A strong password is 16 characters at least and mixes uppercase, lowercase, numbers and symbols. Use a password manager to store them so you do not need to remember them all.
Turn on two-step login everywhere
Once the passwords are new, turn on two-step login (also called two-factor authentication or multi-factor authentication). A strong password alone is not enough. Two-step means that even if someone has your password, they cannot get in without something else: a code from your phone, a security key, or an app that generates codes. Most people can intercept an SMS code, so choose an app that generates codes or a security key if you can.
Start with what matters most: your email, your banking, and any account that holds money or documents. Then add it to everything else. Turn on multi-factor authentication and use strong passwords 1. Some apps prompt you to approve a login from a new device. Use that too. If they try to log in, you will see it and can deny access.
Switch off location sharing
Turn off location sharing on your phone. If you turned it on for them, or if you use location sharing with Apple, Google or your phone provider, switch it off. Check what you have set up right now:
- Apple: Settings > Privacy > Location Services, and check which apps have access.
- Google and Android: Settings > Privacy > Permission apps, then Location.
- Shared location with other people: turn it off in the Maps or Find app. If they are still able to see where you are, unfriend or remove them.
They should not know where you are, where you work, or where you go. If someone always knew your patterns, they will keep looking unless they cannot see them.
Revoke private photo access
On Dateable, you control private photos. You can give or take away access per person. Turn off access right now. On your profile, go to your photos, select the album, and remove them.
Check anywhere else you shared private photos: messages, email, iCloud shared albums, or any other site. If you sent photos off Dateable, look back at where. Delete them if you can. If they are on their device, you cannot delete them, but you can ask them to do so. If they refuse, know that you have a right to privacy. In most places, keeping explicit images of an ex-partner without consent is a crime. If they threaten to share them, that is extortion. Report it.
Check shared accounts
Look for any streaming or travel accounts you shared:
- Netflix, Spotify, Apple Music, or other services you share: change the password and log them out on all devices, or remove them as a user.
- Airline accounts: remove their name as a trusted traveller or emergency contact.
- Hotels, resorts, or membership programs: take their name off.
- Shared calendars, folders or documents: review who has access. Delete shared calendars or remove them.
They should not see where you travel, what you watch, or anything that could tell them your patterns.
Review your social media privacy
Check who can see your social media. On each platform, go to Settings and Privacy, and set your account to private if it is not already. Then review who follows you:
- Unfriend or remove them from your followers.
- Hide the old posts from while you were together: go back through your timeline, check the privacy on each post, and change posts they are tagged in to private.
- Turn off the ability to tag you in posts. Instagram: Settings > Privacy > Allow others to tag you; set it to Off.
They should not see your new photos, your new dates, or where you spend your time. Make your privacy choices on your profile clear to yourself: what is public, what is for friends only, and what is for no one else. Then make sure the settings match.
Report on Dateable
If they have harassed you, threatened you, or shared your private content without permission, report them on Dateable. A report reaches a real person. You do not need to explain everything: say what you need to say. If their behaviour is illegal, report it to the police as well.
Sources
- Scamwatch (ACCC) (2026). Account or identity takeover scams.
