Guides

How to protect your privacy

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Keep your real name, number, home and bank details to yourself: a dating email, a second number, clean photos, locked social media and safe payments.

11 minute readUpdated 2026-09-30

By the end of this guide you will have a dating email, a second phone number, photos that say nothing about where you live, social media a stranger cannot trace, and a plan for money that keeps your bank details to yourself. It takes about an hour, and you only do it once.

Privacy here is not secrecy. It means you decide what each person learns about you, and when. A date earns your surname, your suburb and your workplace over time; a stranger on the internet never gets them.

Why it matters

Every detail you share is a thread. A first name plus a job plus a gym is often enough to find a full name, and a full name finds an address. Australian research on almost 10,000 dating app and website users found people who shared more information, and chatted with people across different platforms, were more likely to report sexual violence facilitated by a dating app ¹. Scammers use the same threads: small personal details such as a birthday or a pet's name help them break into accounts ².

Safety bodies agree on the core rule. Keep your surname, home address and workplace to yourself until you trust the person ³. Add your date of birth, family names and the places you go regularly to that list ⁴.

What Dateable already does

Some of the work happens before you lift a finger:

• Your age shows; your date of birth never does. You enter it once to confirm you are 18 or over.
• Location data is stripped from every photo on upload. Phones store hidden details in each photo file, known as EXIF data, which can include where it was taken.
• Every photo is reviewed before any other member sees it.
• Private photos sit in private storage and open only for members you grant, one at a time. The details are in private photos and who sees them.
• Invitations on the Board refuse contact details. Phone numbers, emails, handles and links are blocked from listings; contact happens in messages after the host accepts a guest. A venue name shows only to the accepted guest.
• Blocking is total. A blocked member never sees you again: not in search, not on the Board, not in messages.
• Dateable never stores card details, and never holds or moves money between members.
• Your verification selfie is deleted 30 days after the decision. Dateable keeps the decision and the date.

The rest is yours to do. The steps below cover what Dateable cannot reach: your email, your phone, your camera roll, your social media and your bank. How Dateable itself handles your data is set out on our privacy page.

Step 1: Set up a dating email

1. Create a new email address used for nothing else. Your everyday address is often your name, and a search for it turns up old accounts, reviews and posts.
2. Choose a name with no part of your real name, birth year or suburb in it. "juliet.w.1994" gives away a first name, an initial and an age.
3. Turn on multi-factor authentication and use a strong, unique password. Scammers who get into an account can change the password and lock you out ⁵. A dating email holds every notification from every site you use.
4. Use it to join Dateable and any other dating service. If an account is ever exposed, it leads back to an inbox, not to you.
5. Change your email in Settings if you joined with your everyday address. Settings holds your email, notifications, privacy, blocked members, pause and delete.

Step 2: Get a second number

Your mobile number is the most revealing thing you can hand over. It can be searched, it is often linked to your social media, and scammers who port a number to their own device can intercept bank SMS codes and one-time PINs ⁵. A WA Consumer Protection warning about sugar baby scams lists a request for your phone number, home address or banking details as a red flag ⁶.

1. Keep talking in Dateable messages for as long as you can. Messages stay on the platform, where blocking and reporting work. Safety bodies advise staying on the dating platform until you are sure who someone is ⁷.
2. Get a second number before you need one. A cheap prepaid SIM in a spare phone, a second eSIM line, or a second-number app all work. Pick from the table below.
3. Save each contact with a note. "Sam, Dateable, dinner 12 Oct" beats "Sam" when you need to find a conversation, or hand one to police.
4. Give your real number only when you trust the person. For most people that is after a few dates, not before the first.
5. Check the number is not linked to your social media or messaging apps. Many apps offer to find friends from your contacts, and some show your profile to anyone who saves your number.

When someone asks for your number early, you can say no without killing the conversation:

"I keep things on here until we've met. It's nothing personal, it's just how I do it. Happy to keep talking here."

"Let's get the first date in the diary and swap numbers after. I'm free Thursday evening."

Step 3: Clean your photos

Dateable strips the hidden location data when you upload. It cannot remove what the camera saw. A photo can still show the street you live on, your office lobby or your car.

1. Use photos that appear nowhere else online. Anyone can run a reverse image search, the same check safety bodies advise for spotting fake profiles ⁸. A dating photo that is also your LinkedIn picture leads straight to your full name and employer.
2. Take new photos for dating if you can. An afternoon with a friend and a phone gives you a set that exists only here.
3. Zoom into the background of each one. Look for house numbers, street signs, mail, name badges, lanyards, school or work logos, a view from your window and number plates. Crop or choose another photo.
4. Leave out your children, your friends and anyone who has not agreed. A friend's face can lead back to your circle.
5. Turn off location for your camera app. The Australian privacy regulator advises switching on location services only when needed and sharing location with as few apps as possible ⁹. Then the location never goes into the file at all.
6. Strip location before sending a photo anywhere else. Other apps and email may not remove it. Most phones let you turn off location in the share options before you send.

Photos of you count as personal information under Australian privacy law when your identity is clear or could reasonably be worked out ¹⁰. For choosing and ordering your set, read how to choose your photos.

Step 4: Lock down your social media

Assume a curious date will search for you. Make sure what they find is what you chose.

1. Search yourself first. Search your full name, your email, your phone number and your usernames, then run a reverse image search on your profile photos. You now see what a stranger sees.
2. Set every account to private or friends only. Start with the ones that show your face, your workplace or your suburb.
3. Hide your friend and follower lists. A list of friends points to your family, your workplace and your school.
4. Remove your workplace, suburb and relationship details from public profiles. Keep them for people you know.
5. Turn off "find me by phone number or email". Most social apps offer it in privacy settings. Leaving it on lets anyone with your number find your profile.
6. Stop posting in real time. Post the café photo after you leave, not while you are there. Regular check-ins map your week.
7. Use a different username on Dateable. Your display name here should not match a handle you use anywhere else.

Step 5: Write a profile that gives nothing away

Your profile can be warm and specific without being traceable.

1. Give your city, not your suburb. The city field is enough for search.
2. Describe your work by field, not by employer. "I work in finance" is interesting; "I run the tax team at a firm on George Street" is an address.
3. Talk about interests, not venues. "Sunday morning swims" tells a date who you are; the name of your beach tells them where to find you.
4. Leave out anything unique to you. A rare job title, a local award or a public role can be searched in seconds.

Step 6: Keep your bank details out of it

Money is where privacy and safety meet. Dateable never holds, moves or guarantees money between members; any gift or allowance is between the two of you. That makes how it moves your decision.

1. Never send money to someone you have not met in person. Every scam-reporting body says so ^{8 13}.
2. Never give your bank login, card number or one-time codes to anyone. No genuine person needs them to be generous to you.
3. Never pay a fee, a "loyalty test" or a deposit to receive money. A common sugar baby scam offers to pay your bills or debts, then asks for a small payment first and disappears ⁶.
4. Never send back money that "arrived by mistake", and never buy gift cards. In another version the scammer deposits a large sum, claims an error, and asks for it back in gift card codes; the deposit came from fraudulent accounts, so it disappears and the victim is left in debt ⁶.
5. Never move money for someone. Receiving and forwarding money at someone else's direction can make you a money mule, and can lead to criminal charges ¹⁴.
6. Know what a payment shows. A bank transfer or payment app can show the other person your full name. Decide whether they know it yet before you share account details.
7. Keep your dating money in its own account if gifts arrive regularly. It keeps records clean and keeps your main account number private.

When someone asks for your details before you have met, one line is enough:

"I don't share bank details before meeting. If that's a problem, we're not a match."

Dateable is free, so there is nothing to buy, and Dateable never stores card details.

Step 7: Protect yourself when you meet

Meeting is where online privacy becomes physical.

1. Meet somewhere public, never at your home. Never go to their place, or have them come to yours, on a first date ⁴.
2. Get there and home by your own transport. A lift home tells them your address; your own ride also lets you leave when you choose ⁴.
3. Tell a friend who, where and when, and share your location with that friend only ¹². Switch sharing off afterwards.
4. Pay with a card that shows only your first name if you split the bill. Or pay at the counter away from the table.
5. Keep your phone locked with a PIN ⁹ and face down. A lock screen full of notifications tells a date a lot.

The full plan for the day is on our safety page.

Step 8: Keep it tidy

1. Revoke private album access from anyone who has gone quiet. A short list is a safer list.
2. Block, do not just ignore, anyone who worried you. Blocking removes you from their search, the Board and their messages.
3. Pause when you take a break. Pausing hides your profile and keeps your data.
4. Delete your account when you are done for good. Dateable deletes your profile, photos, messages and applications within 30 days. It cannot reach copies held elsewhere, so revoke access first. The details are in deleting your account and data.
5. Search yourself every few months. New posts, tags and old accounts turn up. Five minutes keeps your picture of what is public accurate.

Your privacy checklist

If something has already gone wrong, the sugar dating safety guide covers scams, threats and image abuse in full, with who to call.

Questions people ask

Should I use my real name on a dating site?

Use your real first name if you like, but never your surname. A first name alone is common; a first name with a surname, a job or a suburb can be searched in seconds. On Dateable your display name is your choice, and your date of birth is never shown, only your age. Share your surname once you have met and trust the person.

Is it safe to give my phone number to a match?

Not before you have met and come to trust them. A mobile number can be searched, is often linked to your social media, and can be used against your accounts. Keep talking in Dateable messages, where blocking and reporting work, then give a second number from a spare SIM, eSIM or second-number app. Pressure to move off the platform early is a common scam sign.

Can someone find my location from a photo?

Photo files can store hidden EXIF data, including where the photo was taken. Dateable strips it on upload, but other apps and email may not. The bigger risk is what the camera saw: a street sign, a house number, a work lanyard or a view from your window. Check every background, and turn off location for your camera app.

Can a match find my Instagram or Facebook from my dating photos?

Yes, if the same photo appears on both. Anyone can run a reverse image search, and a photo you also use on social media leads straight to your account. Use photos taken for dating only, set social accounts to private, hide your friend lists, and turn off the setting that lets people find you by phone number or email.

How do I receive an allowance without sharing my bank details?

Early on, you do not need to: gifts and paid dinners in person share nothing. When money moves later, remember a bank transfer or payment app can show your full name. Use a separate account and never pay a fee to receive money. Dateable never holds or moves money between members, so how it moves is between the two of you.

What should I do if a match found out where I work or live?

Stop replying. Take screenshots of their profile and your messages, then block and report them on Dateable. A blocked member never sees you again in search, on the Board or in messages. If you feel in danger, call police; in Australia, 000 in an emergency. Then check your social media settings to find how they learned it.

Does deleting my dating account remove my photos?

On Dateable, deleting your account deletes your profile, photos, messages and applications within 30 days. It cannot reach copies someone saved or photographed before you left. Revoke private album access from anyone you no longer trust first. If you only want a break, pause instead: your profile is hidden and your data waits for your return.

Sources

1. Wolbers, H., & Dowling, C. (Australian Institute of Criminology) (2024). Routine online activities and vulnerability to dating app facilitated sexual violence.
2. Get Cyber Safe (Government of Canada) (2023). Spot the signs of a catfish on dating platforms.
3. New Zealand Police (2026). Safety advice.
4. Sexual Assault Resource Centre, North Metropolitan Health Service (Government of Western Australia) (2021). Safe online dating.
5. Scamwatch (ACCC) (2026). Account or identity takeover scams.
6. WA ScamNet (Government of Western Australia, Consumer Protection) (2026). Sugar baby scam.
7. Stop! Think Fraud (UK Government) (2026). Protect yourself from romance fraud.
8. Scamwatch (ACCC) (2026). Relationship scams.
9. Office of the Australian Information Commissioner (2026). Mobile devices.
10. Office of the Australian Information Commissioner (2026). Photos and videos.
11. eSafety Commissioner (2026). Image-based abuse (including revenge porn, sextortion and nude image blackmail).
12. eSafety Commissioner (2026). Online dating | How to stay safe.
13. Federal Trade Commission (2022). What To Know About Romance Scams.
14. Commodity Futures Trading Commission (2023). Customer Advisory: Beware Offers to Receive and Forward Money.
15. Federal Trade Commission (2023). Avoiding and Reporting Gift Card Scams.
16. IDCARE (2026). IDCARE.