Guides

Private photos and who sees them

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How Dateable's private album works: what to put in it, how to grant and revoke access member by member, and how to keep every photo safe.

9 minute readUpdated 2026-09-30

By the end of this guide you will have a private album set up, and you will know how to grant it to one member and take it back again. You will also know what belongs in it, what never does, and what to do if a photo leaves Dateable without your say.

Your private album is a second set of photos, kept apart from your public ones. Nobody sees it unless you let them in, one member at a time, and you can shut the door on any of them whenever you choose.

How the private album works

Every profile has two sets of photos. Your public photos show on your profile to members who can browse. Your private album shows only to members you have granted, and only once they are verified.

• Up to 12 public photos and up to 12 private photos. Two separate sets, each with its own limit.
• Your first public photo shows your face. That rule covers the public set. Your private album has no such rule, which is why it suits photos you would rather not show a stranger.
• Every photo is reviewed before anyone else sees it, public or private. A photo that breaks the community rules never reaches another member.
• Location data is stripped on upload. Phones store hidden details in each photo file, known as EXIF data, which can include where it was taken. Dateable removes it when you upload.
• Access is per member. Someone asks, you grant or ignore, and you can revoke later. Granting one member tells nobody else anything.
• Only verified members can see a private album they were granted. A granted member who is not yet verified sees nothing until they pass the selfie check. More on that in how verification works.

The photos themselves sit in private storage. Dateable hands out a checked link each time someone opens one, so a photo opens only for members allowed to see it.

Decide what goes in it

A private album earns its place when a photo is fine for someone you have spoken to, but not for anyone scrolling. Think of it as the photos you would show a date across the table, not the photos you would put on a billboard.

Good candidates:

• A clearer face photo, if your public set keeps your face partly turned or in soft focus.
• Photos from your life: a trip, a gallery opening, you in your favourite coat at dinner.
• Full-length photos that show your style for the occasions you enjoy.
• A photo in a setting that could identify you, such as a well-known local spot, once you trust the person.

Keep out:

• Anything you would be devastated to see posted somewhere else. That is the test for every photo you share with anyone, anywhere.
• Your workplace, your uniform, your street, your car's number plate, your children, or a friend who has not agreed to be in it.
• Screenshots of messages, documents, tickets or anything with a name, address or number on it.

For help picking and ordering the photos themselves, including the public set, read how to choose your photos.

Set up your album

1. Open your profile and go to the Photos tab. Your public and private sets sit there side by side, so you can see what a stranger sees and what a granted member sees.
2. Upload your private photos one at a time. Looking at each one on its own stops a photo you did not mean to include slipping through in a batch.
3. Zoom in on the background of each photo before you save it. Mail on a bench, a lanyard, a name on a coffee cup or a view from your window can say more than your face. Dateable strips the hidden location data; it cannot remove what the camera saw.
4. Wait for review. A new photo shows to nobody until it is reviewed. If one is declined, check it against the community rules and upload a different photo.
5. Get verified if you have not already. Verification is the step that lets you see albums other members grant you, and it tells members asking for yours that a reviewer has matched you to your photos. The steps are in how to get verified.

When someone asks to see your album

A member asks from your profile. The request is a question, not a debt. You owe nobody access, and you owe nobody a reason.

Before you decide, look at three things:

1. Their profile. Read it properly. A profile with a real headline, a real bio and photos that match each other is a better sign than a blank one.
2. Their badge. Verified means a reviewer matched a live selfie to their profile photos. It confirms the person matches the photos. It is not an ID or age document check, so it is a good sign, not a guarantee.
3. Your conversation, if you have one. Someone who asks for your album before saying hello is telling you what they came for.

If you want to know more before deciding, say so in a message. Some words you can use:

"Thanks for asking. I open my album once we've talked a little. Tell me what caught your eye on my profile?"

"I keep my private photos for people I've chatted with. Happy to keep talking and revisit it."

If the answer is no, you can leave the request alone, or be direct:

"I'm going to keep my album closed for now. No offence meant."

Grant access

1. Grant from the request, one member at a time. Access is per member, so granting one person never opens your album to anyone else.
2. Tell them you have done it. It sets the tone and shows you chose this on purpose.
3. Note who you granted and when. A line in your phone's notes app is enough. If a photo turns up somewhere it should not, a short list of who could see it helps you and anyone you report to.

"I've opened my album for you. Enjoy, and I'd love to hear about your weekend."

Granting is not a promise of anything else. It does not mean a date, it does not mean more photos, and it does not mean the other person may share them.

Ask to see someone else's album

The same manners apply the other way. Ask after you have talked, say why, and accept the answer the first time.

"I've enjoyed talking with you. Would you be comfortable opening your album? No pressure either way."

If they say no, reply once and move on:

"Of course. Still keen to keep chatting."

Once granted, treat the photos as lent, not given. Do not save, screenshot, forward or show them to a friend. Doing that with an intimate image can be a crime: in NSW, for example, distributing an intimate image without consent, or threatening to, is an offence, and consent to one sharing is not consent to another ³. That is general information, not advice; the law differs by state and country.

Revoke access

You can take access back from any member at any time, for any reason, and you do not have to explain. Common reasons: the conversation went nowhere, you met and did not click, an arrangement ended, or something about them now feels wrong.

1. Revoke that member's access. Access is per member, so revoking one person changes nothing for anyone else.
2. Stop there if the contact was ordinary. You do not need to send a message. Revoking quietly is fine.
3. Block as well if they worried you. A blocked member never sees you again: not in search, not on the Board, not in messages. Revoking alone takes away the album; blocking takes away you.
4. Report if they broke a rule. Reporting sends it to the review team. The steps are in how to report and block.

If you want to say something, keep it short:

"I've closed my album while I take a step back. I wish you well."

Which control to use

Tidy your album now and then

Every month or two, open the Photos tab and ask two questions. Is every photo still one you are comfortable with? Is everyone on your granted list still someone you talk to? Revoke anyone who has gone quiet. A short list is a safer list.

If you change your first public photo, you will need to verify again, because the badge matches your face to your photos. Your private album is unaffected.

If a photo leaves Dateable

If a private photo turns up somewhere else, or someone threatens to share one, it is not your fault, and you have options. Image-based abuse is sharing, or threatening to share, an intimate image of someone without their consent ⁴. It is common: a survey of 6,109 people in the United Kingdom, Australia and New Zealand found 37.7% had experienced it at least once since age 16, and online dating was among the predictors ⁵.

1. Do not pay and do not send more. If someone is blackmailing you, eSafety's advice is to pay nothing, send no more images and stop all contact ⁴.
2. Keep the evidence. Screenshot the post, the threat, their profile and your messages before you block. You will need them for a report.
3. Report the member to Dateable through the report page or their profile.
4. Ask the site where it appeared to remove it. For a photo of you posted without permission, the Australian privacy regulator suggests asking the person who posted it first, then the website ¹.
5. In Australia, report to eSafety. It can help remove the content or stop the threats, and police may be able to investigate because criminal laws cover image-based abuse ⁴.
6. Consider StopNCII.org for intimate images. It makes a digital fingerprint of the image on your own device and shares only that fingerprint with participating companies, which use it to find and block the image. You can use it if you are in the image, were 18 or over when it was taken, and still have it ⁶.

For a fuller plan, including who to call outside Australia, see our safety page and the sugar dating safety guide.

Questions people ask

Who can see my private photos on Dateable?

Only members you grant, one at a time, and only once they are verified. Nobody else sees your private album: not people browsing, not members you have not granted, and not a blocked member. Every private photo is also reviewed before anyone sees it. You can revoke access from any member whenever you like, without giving a reason.

Does someone know if I revoke their access to my private album?

Assume they may notice the album no longer opens for them. You do not need to explain. If the contact was ordinary, revoking quietly is fine. If you want to say something, one line works: "I've closed my album while I take a step back. I wish you well." Block as well if the person worried you.

Can someone screenshot my private photos?

No app can stop someone photographing their screen with a second phone, so treat any photo you share as one that could be copied. Share only what you could live with being seen elsewhere. Sharing an intimate image without consent can be a crime in many places, and in Australia eSafety can help remove it. Report the member to Dateable too.

How many private photos can I upload?

Up to 12 private photos, on top of up to 12 public photos. The two sets are separate. Your first public photo must show your face; the private album has no such rule. Every photo in both sets is reviewed before anyone else sees it, and the hidden location data stored in the file is stripped when you upload.

Should I put nude photos in a private album?

Think hard before sharing any intimate image with someone you met online. A private album keeps photos away from strangers, but it cannot stop a granted member copying their screen, and image-based abuse is common among people who date online. Every photo is reviewed against the community rules before anyone sees it, so check those rules first.

Why can't I see a private album someone granted me?

Private albums open only for verified members. If someone granted you access and nothing shows, finish the selfie verification from the verification tab of your profile. Once a reviewer approves it, albums you were granted open for you. If you are already verified, the other member may have revoked access, which is their choice.

What happens to my private photos if I delete my account?

Deleting your account deletes your profile, photos and messages within 30 days, private album included. If you only want a break, pause instead: your profile is hidden and your photos wait for your return. Neither step can reach copies someone already made outside Dateable, so revoke access early from anyone you no longer trust.

Sources

1. Office of the Australian Information Commissioner (2026). Photos and videos.
2. eSafety Commissioner (2026). Online dating | How to stay safe.
3. Legal Aid NSW (2017). Crimes Amendment (Intimate Images) Act 2017.
4. eSafety Commissioner (2026). Image-based abuse (including revenge porn, sextortion and nude image blackmail).
5. Powell, A., Scott, A. J., Flynn, A., & McCook, S. (2022). A multi-country study of image-based sexual abuse: extent, relational nature and correlates of victimisation experiences.
6. StopNCII.org (Revenge Porn Helpline, SWGfL) (2026). Stop Non-Consensual Intimate Image Abuse.