DateableHow to lock down your social media before you start dating
Make your accounts private, remove personal details from your bios, and hide old tagged photos, because someone who searches you will find these first.
Before you start dating, tighten your social media privacy so a match who searches you learns only what you choose to show them. A private account stops most strangers seeing your posts, your friends list and your tagged photos. A public account with your surname, workplace and suburb in the bio tells them where to find you offline.
Why it matters: what a search reveals
When you match with someone, they will search you. Anti-scam services tell daters to do exactly this: search the other person's name across platforms to check they are who they claim 1. So expect it, and control what they find.
A public profile with your real name shows them your workplace, your suburb, your family members in the friends list, and your colleagues. A public account with years of posts shows them your regular places, your routines and the people you spend time with. Tagged photos of you at home or with your family reveal locations and relationships you may not want a stranger to know.
Someone who finds all of this has enough to track you offline. Someone who finds nothing has to ask you questions instead, and you get to decide what you share.
Make your accounts private
On every social media platform you use, switch to a private account. This means strangers cannot see your posts, photos, friends list or followers. Only people you have approved can see them.
- On Instagram and TikTok, go to Settings and toggle Private Account on.
- On Facebook, go to Settings and Privacy, set your profile to Friends Only and restrict who can find you by name.
- On LinkedIn, adjust who can see your connections, posts and profile details.
- On X (formerly Twitter), switch to a private account under Privacy and Safety settings.
A private account stops the casual search. It does not stop someone determined to find you by asking friends or using data brokers, but it makes you harder to find and shows you value your privacy.
Clean your bio and basic info
Remove your surname, workplace name and suburb from your bio and profile details. These are the first things someone searches for.
Do not write your company name, job title or the suburb where you live. Do not write your full address, phone number, or email address. If you want to tell a date any of these things, tell them in a conversation when you are ready, not to millions of people online.
Keep your bio brief and light: hobbies you enjoy, a book you are reading, something funny. This gives them something to ask you about in a message, which is better than them already knowing where you work.
Deal with old tagged photos
Search your name on each platform and look at photos people have tagged you in. Old tagged photos from years ago may show your home, your family, parties you attended or people you spent time with.
You have two choices for each one: ask the person who posted it to untag you, or request the platform remove it. Most platforms let you untag yourself from a photo without asking permission, which means the photo stays but your name no longer links to it in search. Untagging stops the casual search.
For photos you strongly dislike or that show sensitive information, ask the poster to take it down. Most people will. If they will not, report it to the platform.
Limit who can find you by phone or email
Social media platforms let people search for you by your phone number or email address if you have synced them. Turn this off.
- On Instagram and Facebook, go to Settings and adjust who can find you by phone or email.
- On LinkedIn, set who can see your email in your contact information.
- Disable contact syncing that uploads your phone contacts automatically.
This stops someone who has your number from simply typing it into Instagram and seeing all your details at once. A romantic scammer builds trust over time before asking for money 2, and one of the first things they might do is try to find you on every platform they can.
Check again in a few months
Social media platforms change their settings regularly. Friends tag you in new photos. Your own old posts may resurface. Check your privacy settings every three months, untag any new photos you dislike, and make sure your bio still hides your surname and workplace.
If you are using Dateable, your privacy here is about the people outside the platform, not the members on it. You control who sees your private photo album on Dateable one person at a time. Off Dateable, you control what the rest of the internet sees about you when someone searches your name.
When you are ready to write a profile that attracts the person you want to meet, you get to choose exactly what to share and with whom. A tight social media presence before you start means no one gets a head start on knowing you better than you have decided to let them.
Sources
- Get Cyber Safe (Government of Canada) (2023). Spot the signs of a catfish on dating platforms.
- Scamwatch (ACCC) (2026). Relationship scams.
