DateableMyth: scammers only target sugar babies
Generous members are prime targets because they hold the money. Scammers use fake profiles with stolen photos and stories about emergencies, travel and crypto.
Scammers target generous members, not attractive members, because generous members hold the money. They build fake profiles from stolen photos and create urgent stories to get you to send money: medical emergencies, plane tickets home, visa fees, or investment tips that promise a return.
Who scammers really hunt
The myth says scammers are after sugar babies, but the truth is simpler: they are after money. Generous members are the hunting ground because you are the one with cash to move. A profile that exists only to extract funds does not need to be attractive by conventional standards. It needs to match what the target person wants to believe: proof that someone is interested in them, and an urgent reason to help.
On Dateable and every dating site, scammers make fake profiles by borrowing photos from real people. They search stolen images from Instagram, TikTok or legitimate dating profiles, then paste them into a new account with a simple story. The profile does not have to fool you for long, only long enough to move the conversation to private messaging and build your trust.
The stories they tell
Once a scammer has your attention, the request comes. The FTC lists the most common ones: medical bills they cannot pay, plane tickets to meet you, visa fees for a work placement or travel, or an investment tip that sounds too good to refuse 1. Each one sounds urgent. Each one needs your money now.
Cryptocurrency is a favourite, and for a reason: the transaction cannot be reversed, the account cannot be closed, and recovery is nearly impossible 1. A scammer might tell you they have found an investment opportunity, ask you to open an account, let you see small profits on screen, then push you to move larger sums. When you ask to withdraw, the platform locks you out and the scammer disappears.
The stories always move fast. A scammer is not patient with you for months. They build pressure. They create a crisis. They move you off the dating platform into WhatsApp or email within days, which makes you harder to report and easier to isolate 2.
Why the fake profile works
A fake profile does not work because you are foolish. It works because you want it to work. You joined a dating site to meet someone. A profile arrives that says what you want to hear. The photos are attractive. The message is personal. The attention feels real. A scammer is not trying to trick a detective: they are trying to move you past the moment when your doubt could stop the money.
Photos are almost never the person's real ones. Run a reverse image search on any profile photo before you move to private messaging. If the same photo appears on multiple accounts, or appears anywhere else online without a name that matches their story, stop 2.
The same rule for both sides
Generous and attractive members live by one rule: never send money to someone you have not met in person. No medical emergency is real enough. No plane ticket is urgent enough. No investment is good enough. The rule is not about generosity: it is about safety. A real person who wants to meet you will wait until you do.
This rule protects you whether you are the one with money to give or the one receiving it. A request for money before you have met in person is the pattern scammers follow, and it is a warning sign whoever it comes from 1. Careful members treat it as a stop sign.
What to watch for
- A profile with few photos, or photos that look professionally shot (stock images, modelling pictures)
- Strong feelings declared quickly, or pressure to move off the dating app within days
- Excuses to avoid meeting or video calls
- A story that creates urgency: a family member in hospital, a business investment with a closing date, a visa that expires
- A request for money, gift cards, or help with a financial transaction
- A push to open a cryptocurrency account or download an investment app
If you spot any of these, stop replying. On Dateable, report and block from the profile. A block hides their messages and stops them sending new ones. A report reaches our team and helps us spot patterns.
If money has already moved
Contact your bank straight away. Tell them the money went to a scammer. The earlier you report it, the better the chance your bank can stop it on the other end. Keep the conversation you had: screenshots matter.
Generous members often hesitate to report a scam because it feels like a failure, or because they are embarrassed. It is neither. A scammer is a criminal, and their skill is persuasion. Your only mistake was believing a person who turned out to be a professional liar. Report it to Dateable, to your bank, and if you live in Australia, to IDCARE (1800 595 160) if your identity has been compromised. To learn about safety on generous dating sites, read the full guide for generous members. If you want the broader context, the sugar dating guide walks through how to stay safe and build trust with a real partner. And for everyone, sugar dating safety has the core rules.
Sources
- Federal Trade Commission (2022). What To Know About Romance Scams.
- Get Cyber Safe (Government of Canada) (2021). Online dating cyber security: Three ways to stay protected.
