DateableShould you believe a message saying someone has a video of you?
If you never sent intimate images or undressed on camera, it is almost certainly a bluff: block, report and move on.
If you never sent intimate photos or undressed on camera, a message claiming someone has a video of you is almost certainly a bluff. Sextortion scammers use threats to pressure you into paying, and sometimes the video they claim to have does not exist at all. Do not reply, do not pay, and do not send more images. Block the person, report them and move on.
How sextortion scams work
Sextortion is blackmail where a scammer threatens to share an intimate image or video to get money. Sextortion scammers work through dating sites, social media and gaming apps, and they use two main tactics 1. Some falsely claim to have images or videos of you. Others trick people into sharing nudes or record them on video chat without their knowledge, then use the material to extort money.
The threat is always the same shape: pay, or the images go to your family and friends. Pay once and the demands keep coming 1.
If you never sent images or went on camera
A claim without proof is usually a bluff. The whole scam runs on panic: the message wants you to pay before you stop and think about whether any such video could exist.
So think about it now. If you never sent anyone intimate images and never undressed on camera, there is nothing real for them to share. Do not ask for proof. Asking is a reply, and a reply is what they want.
What to do right now
Stop replying. A reply tells the scammer your account is live and the threat landed. Scamwatch's advice is to end contact as soon as you suspect something 1.
Do not send money, not even a small amount. If you pay, the scammer comes back and asks for more 2. They have already made money from you once, and you have shown you are willing to pay under pressure.
Block the person and report the account on the platform where the message arrived. Adults are targeted on dating sites and apps too. WA Consumer Protection and WA Police say: block, report to the platform, and contact WA ScamNet on 1300 30 40 54 2.
Already paid? You can still act. Call your bank straight away and tell them the payment went to a scammer. IDCARE on 1800 595 160 helps if you also handed over identity details, and Scamwatch takes the report 3. Then stop paying, whatever the next message says.
I don't know what you are talking about, and I won't be responding again.
If you do reply before you can stop yourself, one firm message like this, then silence, is enough. Do not explain, do not negotiate, do not ask questions. Scammers read your replies for information they can use.
If you did send intimate images to someone
If you sent intimate images to someone you met on a dating site or app, or you were recorded on video chat, that changes the situation but not your response. You should still not pay, and you should still report the threat.
Image-based abuse is when someone shares or threatens to share an intimate image without consent 4. Criminal laws cover it, so police may be able to investigate. You can also report it to the eSafety Commissioner, who can help have the content removed or stop the threats 4.
If you still have the image, were 18 or over when it was taken, and are the person in it, use StopNCII.org. It makes a hash (a digital fingerprint) of the image on your own device; only the hash is shared, never the image. Participating companies use the hash to find and block the image on their platforms. The Revenge Porn Helpline, which runs it, reports an over 90% removal rate 5.
Report it to the authorities
Sextortion is a serious crime. Report the threat to police, especially if you have been asked for money 1. In Australia, report to Scamwatch or your local police. New Zealand's Consumer Protection lists the same scam: a claim to have intimate images or video of you, with a threat to send them to your contacts 6.
Before you block, screenshot the threat, the profile and any payment details, with the date and the platform. Police and eSafety can act faster on evidence. Ignore any promise to delete the images once you pay: paid scammers come back for more 2.
Protect yourself going forward
Send no intimate images to someone you have not met in person, and keep your clothes on during video calls with new matches. On Dateable, a private album opens only to members you grant, and you can revoke access at any time.
If a threat has already arrived, what to do if something goes wrong lists the steps in order.
Sources
- Scamwatch (ACCC) (2026). Threat scams.
- Government of Western Australia, Consumer Protection and WA Police (2024). Alarm at young adults and teenagers caught up in 'sextortion' scams.
- Scamwatch (ACCC) (2026). Relationship scams.
- eSafety Commissioner (2026). Image-based abuse (including revenge porn, sextortion and nude image blackmail).
- StopNCII.org (Revenge Porn Helpline, SWGfL) (2026). Stop Non-Consensual Intimate Image Abuse.
- Consumer Protection (New Zealand Ministry of Business, Innovation and Employment) (2026). Types of scams.
