DateableWhat to do in the first hours after a sexual assault
Get somewhere safe, tell someone you trust, and get medical care. It is never your fault, whatever you wore or drank. You can take the next step when you are ready.
Get somewhere safe, tell someone you trust, and get medical help from a hospital, clinic or sexual assault service 1. If you are in danger now, call 000. Everything else, including whether to report, can wait until you are ready.
It is never your fault
Sexual assault is never the fault of the person assaulted, whatever you wore, where you were or what you drank 1. What you agreed to earlier does not change that either: consent can be withdrawn at any time, even after sexual activity has started 1. Someone else chose to harm you.
Get somewhere safe
Leave the place where it happened as soon as you can. Go to a house, a public place, a hospital, or anywhere you can call for help. If you are hurt or scared, you do not have to leave alone: call someone you trust, call emergency services on 000, or call a sexual assault service.
If you are still with the person who assaulted you and cannot leave, call 000. If you are hurt, ask for an ambulance.
Tell someone you trust
You do not have to tell anyone if you do not want to. But telling someone can help. Tell a friend, a family member, a housemate, or someone else you trust. Tell them what happened and what you need right now: a place to stay, help getting to a clinic, or just someone to sit with you.
If you are scared of how they will react, you do not have to tell them everything. You can tell them you are hurt and need help without saying why. You can tell them you will explain later when you are ready. You can also tell a counsellor first, who can help you work out what to say and to whom.
If you are not sure who to tell, or nobody is close by, call 1800RESPECT on 1800 737 732. It answers 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, and helps with sexual assault 2. The counsellor can help you think through what to do next.
Get medical care
Go to a hospital, a clinic or a sexual assault service 1. You may have injuries you cannot see, and staff can talk you through your options for tests and treatment. Ask them to explain each step. You can say stop at any time.
In Western Australia, the Sexual Assault Resource Centre is a free 24-hour service for recent sexual assault: call (08) 6458 1828 or 1800 199 888 3. Elsewhere in Australia, 1800RESPECT can tell you the nearest service. Call ahead if you can, and ask what to bring and whether to keep the clothes you were wearing.
Bring someone you trust if you can, and tell staff what you need: a quiet room, time, help calling someone.
Getting medical care does not commit you to reporting. It is your choice. In Victoria there is no time limit to report a sexual offence, and police can investigate even if one of you has blocked or deleted the other on a dating app 4. Reporting to the app is not the same as reporting to police 4.
Australian helplines open 24 hours
- 1800RESPECT: 1800 737 732 or text 0458 737 732. It answers sexual assault, sexual harassment and abuse. You can also chat or video call on their website 2.
- Sexual Assault Resource Centre (WA): (08) 6458 1828 or 1800 199 888 3.
- Full Stop Australia: 1800 385 578 1.
- Police: 000 in an emergency, 131 444 otherwise 3.
- Lifeline: 13 11 14 or text 0477 13 11 14. If you need to talk to someone about how you feel 5.
If you met them on Dateable
You can report the person to Dateable and block them. Reports go to Dateable's review queue, and a blocked member cannot see you in search, the Board or messages. Do not delete your messages with them: they may matter if you report to police later. A sexual assault service can help you with both.
You can take the next step when you are ready
The first hours are about getting safe and getting care. Reporting to police, telling your employer or your family, or deciding how to move forward all come later, if you choose them. You set the pace. You decide what happens next.
Whatever you feel in the hours and days after, whether numb, angry, ashamed or nothing at all, it is not a sign you did something wrong. A counsellor at 1800RESPECT can help with how you feel and with your choices about reporting, whenever you are ready. Talking to them does not commit you to anything.
If asking for help is hard, these words are enough:
Something happened to me tonight and I need help. Can you stay with me while I call for support?
The guide to what to do if something goes wrong and Dateable's safety page are there when you want them.
Sources
- Healthdirect Australia (2023). Sexual assault and rape.
- 1800RESPECT (2026). 1800RESPECT.
- Sexual Assault Resource Centre, North Metropolitan Health Service (Government of Western Australia) (2021). Safe online dating.
- Victoria Police (2025). Dating apps, online platforms, and sexual offences.
- Lifeline Australia (2026). Lifeline Australia.
