DateableWhy you never give a partner your banking login or codes
No real partner needs your password or one-time codes to send you money. With them, someone can lock you out of your own accounts.
No real partner needs your banking password, one-time codes or login details to send you money. If someone asks for any of these, it is a scam. With them, a scammer can lock you out of your own accounts and take everything.
What a real transfer actually needs
A real person who wants to send you money needs only your account number and your bank's routing number, or sometimes just your email or phone number linked to your account. That is all. A genuine transfer does not require you to give them access to log in.
If someone claims they cannot send you money without your password or a one-time code, they are lying. Every bank, payment app and transfer service in the world lets you send money without the receiver's login. A code that arrives on your phone is for you alone, to prove you are the one accessing your account. A real partner will never ask for it.
How scammers use your banking details
Scammers target people on dating sites by pretending to be a generous partner. They may promise to pay your bills, buy you gifts, or set up an allowance. The offers sound generous and the stories are convincing. Once you trust them, they ask for a small favour: your banking details, a transfer code, or your login so they can "send the money faster".
If you give them these, they do not send money. Instead they use them to get into your account. They can 1 change your password and lock you out. They may 1 port your phone number to their own device so they can intercept the one-time codes your bank sends. Once they are in, they take whatever is there.
The sugar baby scam and what to watch for
A common pattern on dating sites is the sugar baby scam 2. A scammer offers to pay debts, cover rent or provide an allowance, but first asks for a small payment as proof you are serious. Once you pay, they disappear. In a second version 2, they deposit a large sum to your account from a stolen credit card, claim it was sent by mistake, and ask you to buy gift cards and send them the codes. When the stolen deposit is reversed, your bank holds you liable for the debt.
Red flags for this scam 2 are direct requests for your banking details, your home address or your phone number. Another is pressure to move the conversation off the dating site to WhatsApp or email, so there is no record. A real partner will never ask you to send gift card codes or to transfer money you did not receive from them.
I can send the money to your account directly if you give me your account number and routing number. I do not need your password.
Turn on multi-factor authentication
Protect yourself by turning on multi-factor authentication (MFA) on every account that matters: your bank, email, dating app and payment services 1. This means that even if someone has your password, they cannot get in without a code that arrives on your phone. Do not share one-time codes with anyone, ever.
Use a strong password that is different for each account. If a scammer tricks you into giving them a password for one site, a strong, unique password keeps them out of the others.
If you already shared your codes
If you have already given someone a one-time code, banking login details or a password, call your bank immediately 1. They can lock your accounts, cancel cards and watch for unauthorised activity. Change your passwords on every site where you used the same one. 3 If the scammer changed your details or stole your identity, call IDCARE on 1800 595 160 (Monday to Friday, 7am-7pm AEST). They are a free identity theft service for people in Australia and New Zealand.
Check your email for password reset requests or notifications of new logins. 1 If you cannot log in or see unexpected contact from your phone provider about your number moving to another device, that is a warning sign of account takeover. Act fast.
You also want to report the profile and block the person. Report to Dateable, then to police or your local fraud reporting service. The more reports they receive, the sooner the profile comes down.
What a real arrangement looks like
In a real arrangement, money comes from a person you have met in person and who is genuinely interested in building something with you. The person does not hide behind a dating app. They do not pressure you to move off the platform quickly or ask you to keep the arrangement secret. They do not ask for your banking details, access to your accounts, or gift card codes. They transfer money the normal way, to an account number you give them, and it arrives. That is it.
If you want to protect your privacy while dating, keep your surname, home address and workplace to yourself until you trust someone. Never send banking details unless you are certain who is asking. And if something feels wrong, stop replying and check our guide on what to do.
Sources
- Scamwatch (ACCC) (2026). Account or identity takeover scams.
- WA ScamNet (Government of Western Australia, Consumer Protection) (2026). Sugar baby scam.
- IDCARE (2026). IDCARE.
